What was old is suddenly new again...

Today has been quite eventful.  I just hung a bag of IV fluids and decided to blog while I'm waiting for it to infuse. It's like deja vu all over again.  With chemo last time we found that giving IV fluids the night before chemo and the night of chemo my nausea was a lot better and I was able to tolerate the chemo a little better.  I don't know what the deal is with adults but with kids we always prehydrated them...why don't they do this with adults??  Lamesauce!  I'm so lucky that I have a doctor that lets me add in the things I want and lets me advocate for myself.  Dr. Litton has always listened to all my craziness and doesn't treat me like I'm crazy.  I love him for that - I'm sure he shakes his head while he walks down the hall after seeing me. :)  Even though I'm probably still his favorite patient. ;) 

Tomorrow is dose #2 of Abraxane.  I think I did pretty good with the last dose - no anaphylaxis, which was a bonus, just a little bit of a rash on my face and chest.  I'll take it.  Between the Abraxane and the Xeloda I've mostly felt really fatigued, and just plain old run down.  I take a few naps a day which makes me feel super lazy, but I can't function without them.  I've had a little nausea, lots of achy bones and muscles and again my feet feel like they are on fire.  They are still blistering and peeling. My lungs are still an issue - I get winded just walking around the house.  I'm up to 3-4L of O2 when up and around and 2L when sitting.  I ordered an oximeter - which has been really helpful in knowing when to adjust my O2.

I'm trying to remember this...I'm so used to being up and busy with work and projects that it is hard for me to just rest and not feel guilty.  I'm learning that when I need to rest and not push my body anymore...it's tired enough.

Sats are looking good tonight...unfortunately they drop to the low 80's when I take my O2 off.

I actually felt like I was a nurse tonight - I was able to access my own port and hook up my fluids.  It felt so good to be "back in action" even if it was just on myself.  I'm glad to know I can still keep up some of my skills.

Getting serious about accessing my port.  P.S. it's not very easy to breathe with a mask on even with O2...lame!

Getting all set up.

All I can see in this picture is the wallpaper...it's gotta be from the 80's...I think there is wallpaper on every wall in my grandma's house. :)

Things have been busy today.  I called the office yesterday because I was feeling like my pleural effusion was filling up again - thought it would be good to get it drained before my counts dropped (which should be about any minute).  They couldn't get me in yesterday so I headed to St. Marks today for the most despised beloved procedure.  I got back to the procedure room and the tech checked my fluid level with an ultrasound.  My lung/chest didn't hurt as much as it did the last time it was drained, so I was prepared for the same amount or maybe less fluid than last time - which was about 350cc's.  So the tech told me "I don't see any reason why they wouldn't drain this" and she called the PA to come do the procedure.  It was Stephanie - she did my very first thoracentesis when she could only get about 30cc's to send for testing - that was the only pocket she could find.  She numbed me up which didn't feel good at all - that lidocaine works good, but it sure does sting.  She numbed it up about three layers deep and then stabbed me in the chest with that awful catheter.  I know that sounds dramatic...but it's true - and she did a very lovely job as far as the procedure goes.  So we sat there talking and waiting for the fluid to drain out.  After about a minute I said "so how much do you think I'm going to drain out today?" (keeping in mind I was thinking around the same as before)  She said "well, we are going to drain it until it stops...you are almost at 1000cc's."  I'm pretty sure I about fell on the floor...good thing I didn't or the catheter would have come out and that would have been a waste of a poke.  1000cc's!!!!!  1 Liter of fluid squeezing my lung and pushing on my liver, stomach, and everything else in there.  No wonder I can't breathe!! I ended up filling up the bottle they were using and yes...it was a whole liter.  I was shocked...and I think my lung was in shock as well.  After they pulled out the catheter I coughed and coughed and it hurt to take a deep breath as I was coughing.  Everything in the right side of my chest hurt.  I think my lung was freaking out because it had some room finally.  They took a chest xray to make sure my lung didn't get punctured and everything was fine. They said my symptoms were normal for how much fluid was in there...but I was a little nervous.  They had me stick around for a bit to make sure everything was ok. Here is what the fluid looked like when they were done...I know it looks like some type of delicious pomegranate drink...but alas - twas not.

1000cc's of pure cancer waste building up between my lung and the lining of my lung. Goodbye yucky cancer crap...don't come back - I don't like you at all!!

After this procedure I felt as if I absolutely deserved a treat so I took Maddie to the Holakai Hawaiian Ice shack and had a little bit of heaven.  It was so delicious - it was hot outside and was the perfect treat.  The best part is when you get to the coconut ice cream.  As much as I loved this delectable treat I paid the price with a brain freeze and more coughing...:(  Dangit!!

Deliciousness!! And only $3...what a bargain!  And I can really sport that nasal cannula - looking good!!

I tried mango and tiger's blood this time...so yummy!

The best part...We might have to go again tomorrow after chemo!!

We also went up and checked out the Bountiful Temple... Angel Moroni got struck by lightning a couple weeks ago and he kinda got messed up.  They took him down for repairs today.

Poor guy.  I learned he has a lightning rod through the middle of him.

My cute niece Sarah came to stay with me over the weekend to help with grandma and make sure I was ok.  She was adorable and so helpful - it was nice to have her around.  Before long she will be in Hawaii on her mission.  While she was here we saw the high school put on Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, I introduced her to Nielson's frozen custard, and Spanky's sandwiches.  Yummo! We mostly took it easy over the weekend - I of course, did a lot of sleeping.  Here's a few of our super exciting memories.

At the musical - I love that the Everetts are totally photo bombing in the background!!

It was a cute show - super hot...I ended up having to get the big umbrella out of the car or my skin would have been toast!

Chocolate and caramel cashew custard....so yummy - didn't last long

Not much walking around with these poor little painful feet...

Grandma and Sarah

Renee and Leini Jenkins made this deliciousness!  I do love chocolate and mint together!!

I guess that's it for today...oh, one more thing...my hair is already starting to fall out - it's only day 7. I thought I had a little longer.  We will probably end up shaving my head on Saturday.  :(  Cancer...I just want to punch it in the face.  More about hair later...that's its very own post.  

Be brave, my heart. Have courage, my soul.

Tiffany